Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Missing my little guy today!

Missing this little face today & longing to hug him, kiss that soft cheek & tell him how much his Mama loves him! 

This little boy is the light of my life, my reason for pushing on through these last two years & one of my main reasons for not staying in a loveless marriage!  I didn't want my sweet boy to think that's what marriage is!  He needs to see how a husband and wife should love one another, support one another and feel the love of a good, solid marriage!  I want him to have an example of how to be a great husband and father some day!  He certainly didn't have a good example for his first 6 years!  His father only stepped up to the plate once I'd told him I had gone to an attorney and was filing for divorce in the summer of 2011.  That's when he started doing one on one things with his son and now he wants to fight me for 50/50 custody?  It's been a year since the divorce was on the road to being final and then it was final at the end of August and that wasn't a concern back then, but now it's become such a big factor for him.  I'm at a loss...yes, kids need their Mom's and Dad's, but as it's been for over a year, his primary place is with me, his Mama!  The one who loved him before he was conceived, who wanted him before he was conceived & the only one in this marriage that wanted him once he was conceived!  I will never forget the conversation of me being ready for a baby in May 2004 & then in January 2005 when I told my ex that I was pregnant.  Shock and no excitement whatsoever.
Love this little boy to the moon and back!  And twice around the sun...Would do anything for him!  give him the clothes off my back and the food from my plate.  Sing a song and make a fool of myself to make him smile!  I love my sweet boy and I just pray he knows how very deep that love goes!

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